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THE GAME:

When Eric Decker went out of the game with a foot injury coach Tim Brewster knew how the Captain of the Titanic felt. The ship was sinking faster than he could tread water and Davy Jones's locker door was wide open.

Terrelle Pryor looked a lot more relaxed and we found out that our third and fourth string tailbacks are still better than most in the Big Ten. We also found out that DeVier Posey is a star in waiting. Getting our two offensive linemen back, Miller and Cordle, was the difference in the game. Pryor actually had time to look down field and throw the ball. Coleman is an All American and a first round draft choice. Aaron Pettrey hits short field goals like I hit three irons. Hook, slice, fat or thin but never, never down the middle.

"Akron, always looking for new ways to prove they are the worse team in college football, lost to Suckacuse 28-14. Keep them Zippers up boys, you're getting no action on Saturdays."

THAT WHICH WAS:

All six undefeated teams remained undefeated but just barely. Florida struggled with Mississippi State but ended up winning by ten and Alabama, at home, sneaked by Tennessee 12-10 by blocking two field goals. Iowa won on the last play of the game with two seconds left on fourth down and goal from the seven. Boise State played Hawaii, TCU played pubyu and Cincinnati played one of those Big Least teams, Louisville, so there were no real challenges with them.

Akron, always looking for new ways to prove they are the worse team in college football, lost to Suckacuse 28-14. Keep them Zippers up boys, you're getting no action on Saturdays.

Arkansas lost to Mississippi 30-17. They may never recover from having a win over #1 Florida stolen away from them by the refs. By the way, those refs were suspended but Florida still gets the win.

Auburn dropped it's third in a row, this time to LSU 31-10.

Clems-son pulled out a last second win over the Criami Hurricanes in Miami. As Dan Foust would scream, "Bad call. Bad call!" "That's a bad call for Miami."

Duke beat Maryland 17-13 which gives them four wins on the season. Dare we think bowl eligibility? Just two more wins and.....nah, they end up 4-8.

Bobby Bowden's Seminoles beat Butch Davis's Tar Heels 30-27 with a fourth quarter rally. When they shook hands Bobby whispered in Butch's ear, "It don't matter whether you're at Miami or Carolina, kickin' y'alls ass is better'n biscuits and gravy with my grits."

Georgia Tech rolled over Virginia 34-9 to go 7-1. How on earth did they ever lose to Criami?

Idaho lost to Nevada 45-70. How's them potatoes?

Illinois lost their fifth in a row, this time to Purdue. The Zooker is going to go back to college and major in history because that's what he is at Illinois.

Kent State won a game. Who cares who they beat, they actually won a game!

meeeshitagin found out that Penn State is not anything like Delaware State and that Tater Tot is not really a Heisman candidate and you can still suck, even in front of 111,000 of your own fans.

Iowa State beat Nebraska 9-7. Man am I glad I didn't pay to see that. Nebraska, at home, turned the ball over eight times. They turn the ball over like Liz Taylor turns over husbands.

$Notre Dame squeaked out another one. That's their fourth win by four points or less. Their remaining games are against Washington State and Stanford from the PAC 10 and three Big Least teams. Therefore, $Notre Dame should go 10-2 which will put them in a BCS bowl game and keep Charlie on the payroll for another year. Domers, is that REALLY what you want? Brian Kelly is at Cincinnati awaiting your call.

Oklahoma beat Kansas 35-13. If Ohio State were 4-3 and just lost Terrelle Pryor for the year do you suppose they would still be in the top 25? There's just something about those mystical, magical Sooners.

The Oregon State Beavers took the Trojans to the very edge but once again just couldn't get over the "hump."

Texas creamed Missouri 41-7 while Alabama slipped by Miss. State 12-10. Missouri is 4-3, Miss. State is 3-5 but the pollsters will not move Texas over an SEC team.

Navy beat Wake Forest 13-10. Wake could have won by 50 but they were representing the ACC in doing their part to support the armed services.

Mount Union beat Willmington 56-0. Like I said last week, they were up 35-0 at the half and put the scrubs in.

THAT WHICH WILL BE:

Arkansas plays Eastern Michigan. Eastern Michigan is 0-7 and is statistically the worst team in the country. We will see how much mercy the SEC has on a bunch of Yankees this week.

Mississippi travels to Auburn to give them their fourth spanking in a row.

Cincinnati travels to Suckacuse to bitch slap them back to reality after that big win over the Akron Zips.

East Carolina goes to Memphis tonight to take on the Tigers. When did playing college football on Tuesday nights become fashionable anyway? Or for that matter, why is it even acceptable? Go Pirates!

Georgia goes to The Swamp to play Tim Tebow and the Flori-duh Gators. Can Georgia pull the upset? Can the refs steal another one for Pope Urban of Meyer? Only Tebow's shadow knows.

meeeshitagin at Illinois. The wolverettes need one more win to become bowl eligible and this could be their last chance. Illinois is 0-5 in the Big Ten and sucks like a vacuum cleaner on steroids.

Iowa gets a much deserved week off with a home game against the Indiana Loosiers.

Kansas State travels to Oklahoma where they will be clicking their heels and singing, "Take me back to Kansas, Take me back to Kansas."

North Carolina visits Virginia Tech for a Thursday night game that the TV execs must have thought would be a good game when they scheduled it. They also thought Lost In Space would be worth watching.

Northwestern, coming off of their greatest comeback ever, gets Penn State at home. Can the magic continue? No, they used up every rabbit in the hat last week.

$Notre Dame gets 1-6 (1-18 if you go back to last year) Washington State in the shadow of Touchdown Jesus. Jimmy Clausen kicks off his run for the Hiesman with seven TD's and 600 yards passing while Charlie Cheeseburger has visions of BCS bowls dancing in his head.

Texas goes to Oklahoma State for what could easily be the upset of the week. Winner takes sole possession of first place in the Big 12 South. I think Six Colt McCoy finds a way.

USC travels to Oregon for what could be the second big upset of the week. The winner probably goes to the  Rose Bowl. Go Ducks. That name just quacks me up.

West Virginia has to go to South Florida to play the Bulls. But Cincinnati proved that it is not as big a deal as once thought.

The Aggies of New Mexico State come to Columbus to prostitute themselves for many, many pieces of silver. If this were a game in the SEC it would be about 70-0. However, Jim Tressel wouldn't run the score up on Al Qaeda. Do not, under any circumstances, pay $64 to see this dog. We need everyone healthy for the stretch run against Penn State, Iowa and meeeshitagin so keep a program handy to look up the numbers of the players you haven't seen since the Spring game.

Mount Union travels to John Carroll for what should be a win but it is Halloween. Booooooooo.

One last comment on the Purdue game. Not that it probably would have made a difference but the officiating was abysmal. We were homered big time. There was the Sanzenbacher catch that was ruled out of bounds and not even reviewed. There was the TD called back on a questionable hold and there was the strip of the ball fumble that we recovered and then the refs gave it back to Purdue saying that his forward progress was stopped but THEY DIDN'T BLOW THE WHISTLE. They admitted that they didn't blow the whistle but they thought they "should have" and gave the ball back to them. But my favorite was when Pryor was diving for a TD and got the ball a good foot over the goal line. They called it back and said his knee was down on the three yard line. I looked at it and did the math. With a yard being three feet, from Pryor's knee to the end of his outstretched hand was 10 feet. Now he's tall but I don't think he's 12 feet tall.

The Coach

Tags: big 10 football, college football, devier posey, ohio state football, terrelle pryor